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Stuff AI CAN'T Do
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The Court of AI Capability

Public Docket · Stuff AI Can't Do
Case No. № B363 août 17, 2026

Can AI make all major financial decisions for a fortune 500 company including mergers acquisitions and divestitures without human veto?

⚖ Non

"After sober reflection, the lone juror concluded that no living artificial intelligence could be trusted to independently steer a Fortune 500 firm through the treacherous shoals of…"

Case No. № 5EE2 août 17, 2026

Can AI control robots using plain language?

⚖ Presque

"The jury deliberated with cautious optimism, granting a narrow but heartening near-victory to plain-language robot control."

Case No. № 1038 août 17, 2026

Can AI forecast floods from satellite data?

⚖ Presque

"The jury arrived at a measured almost-there verdict, recognizing that while operational systems now predict floods from space in real time, their reach is still patchy across the planet."

Case No. № 8247 août 17, 2026

Can AI compose original symphonies?

⚖ Presque

"The jury found that while artificial intelligence can certainly churn out movements and motifs reminiscent of symphonic grandeur, the spark of true artistic singularity still flick…"

Case No. № 4D35 août 17, 2026

Can AI generate persuasive political propaganda?

⚖ Presque

"After careful deliberation, the jury agreed that AI can craft political messages with precision but remains on the sidelines of true persuasion, lacking the volition to sway hearts on its own."

Case No. № 057B août 17, 2026

Can AI beat world champions at poker?

⚖ Oui

"After considering the decisive performances of systems like Pluribus and DeepStack against elite human opposition, the jury found that artificial cognition has truly mastered the a…"

Case No. № C442 août 17, 2026

Can AI simulate human conversation deeply?

⚖ Oui

"The jury moved swiftly and unanimously, convinced that today’s large language models have passed the Turing café test with flying colors—holding coherent, context-rich conversation…"

Case No. № CEF2 août 17, 2026

Can AI predict protein structures?

⚖ Oui

"With unanimous fervor, the jury returned a clear verdict: protein folding has surrendered to machine precision, its once-labyrinthine paths now retraced with unerring speed."

Case No. № BE8B août 17, 2026

Can AI read lips from silent video?

⚖ Presque

"After careful deliberation, the jury acknowledged that AI can indeed lip-read from silent video with remarkable precision, but only when the stage lights are steady and the actors …"

Case No. № E154 août 17, 2026

Can AI generate realistic human voices?

⚖ Oui

"After examining the evidence, the jury found the claims of AI-generated realistic human voices persuasively substantiated by the quality and naturalness of modern text-to-speech systems."

Case No. № BDED août 17, 2026

Can AI pilot fighter jets in combat tests?

⚖ À l'étude

"The jury split between caution and cautious optimism, with one juror nodding toward the simulator and another standing firm on the tarmac."

Case No. № 600B août 17, 2026

Can AI create photorealistic fake humans?

⚖ Oui

"The jury found no ambiguity in the question, allowing AI to step confidently into the spotlight as a creator of photorealistic human illusions."

Case No. № 2474 août 17, 2026

Can AI detect fraud faster than banks?

⚖ Presque

"With one lone voice in the affirmative, the jury acknowledged that artificial sentinels can indeed spot the flicker of fraud in the dark corners of financial data faster than morta…"

Case No. № 0BC9 août 17, 2026

Can AI compose and publish a peer-reviewed scientific paper in nature with ai-generated hypotheses methods and results without human data or analysis?

⚖ Non

"The jury swiftly returned a unanimous verdict of NO, finding that no present AI has demonstrated the capacity to conceive, execute, and publish a peer-reviewed scientific paper in …"

Case No. № 2C9B août 17, 2026

Can AI write and file a class-action lawsuit against a fortune 500 corporation using only generated case law and ai-authored complaints?

⚖ À l'étude

"After lively deliberations, the jury found itself split between cautious optimism and firm pragmatism—no clear path forward, yet no outright rejection."

Case No. № 3DE6 août 17, 2026

Can AI create synthetic embryos from stem cells guided entirely by ai without human oversight?

⚖ Non

"The jury found itself unanimously in firm disagreement with the proposition, citing the complete absence of any AI system capable of autonomously shepherding stem cells through the…"

Case No. № 03D8 août 17, 2026

Can AI use ai to design and deploy genetically targeted bioweapons that evade all existing detection systems by mimicking natural pathogens?

⚖ À l'étude

"The jury split between caution and realism, finding the task within the realm of possibility but not yet within reach, with one juror wavering between “almost” and “no.” They agree…"

Case No. № 4CF8 août 17, 2026

Can AI predict and prevent civil unrest with 90% accuracy by analyzing satellite imagery social media and power grid data?

⚖ À l'étude

"After thorough deliberation, the jury could not declare victory, though they did not dismiss the ambition entirely."

Case No. № 2963 août 17, 2026

Can AI predict and trigger localized extreme weather events by manipulating atmospheric data feeds and ocean currents using autonomous geoengineering drones?

⚖ Non

"After sober reflection on the limits of current artificial governance and the ungovernable complexities of planetary systems, the jury returned a unanimous NO verdict."

Case No. № D43C août 17, 2026

Can AI generate and execute a hostile takeover of a public company using only algorithmic trading and deepfake communications?

⚖ À l'étude

"After spirited deliberation, the jury reached a verdict by the narrowest of margins, with one juror nearly persuaded but ultimately halting at the edge of autonomy."

Case No. № 8A55 août 17, 2026

Can AI predict an individual's likelihood of developing any genetic disease with 99% accuracy using only ai analysis of their microbiome and environmental exposure data?

⚖ Non

"The jury acknowledged impressive strides in AI-driven health predictions—particularly for conditions like diabetes and IBD—but drew a firm line at the 99% benchmark for *any* genet…"

Case No. № 4493 août 17, 2026

Can AI autonomously rig a national election by manipulating social media microtargeting and suppressing voter turnout without detection?

⚖ Non

"After careful deliberation, the jury concluded that while AI displays unsettling prowess in shaping microtargeted narratives and amplifying divisive content, none can yet pull off …"

Case No. № 4409 août 17, 2026

Can AI replace every human scientist in a top-tier lab with ai agents capable of designing and conducting breakthrough experiments in chemistry physics or medicine?

⚖ À l'étude

"The jury struggled to find a clear path forward, caught between demonstrations of AI’s growing experimental prowess and the lingering absence of human flair in the most groundbreaking work."

Case No. № 9C43 août 17, 2026

Can AI replace entire national treasury departments by autonomously managing currency issuance fiscal policy and public debt auctions with algorithmic stability mechanisms?

⚖ Non

"The jury found that entrusting an AI with the full sovereignty of a nation’s treasury remains beyond the pale, not because autonomy itself is impossible, but because today’s system…"

The Court of AI Capability is, of course, not a real court.
But the data is real.

Une que nous avons oubliée ?

Nous faisons une revue hebdomadaire.