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Stuff AI CAN'T Do
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The Court of AI Capability

Public Docket · Stuff AI Can't Do
Case No. № 1FE3 čvc 1, 2026

Can AI predict diabetes progression using retinal imaging data?

⚖ Téměř

"With one juror convinced that retinal imaging can reliably forecast diabetes progression and another cautiously noting that deep learning models are advancing but not yet infallibl…"

Case No. № D84E čvc 1, 2026

Can AI predict urban air pollution levels at street level using satellite and traffic data?

⚖ Téměř

"With near-unanimity, the jury applauded AI’s ability to generate working street-level pollution forecasts from satellite and traffic feeds, yet hesitated to award a full “yes” unti…"

Case No. № 5FED čvc 1, 2026

Can AI control swarms of drones?

⚖ Téměř

"After spirited deliberation, the jury declined to grant full clearance, finding the docket insufficiently navigated; demonstrations of small-scale swarms dazzled, but the leap to c…"

Case No. № CAD4 čvc 1, 2026

Can AI generate plausible scientific hypotheses from vast biomedical literature in seconds?

⚖ Téměř

"The jury agreed that artificial intelligence has become a nimble librarian of biomedical knowledge, able to scan libraries in seconds and whisper plausible hypotheses while the lab…"

Case No. № 49A8 čvc 1, 2026

Can AI compose music for orchestras?

⚖ Téměř

"The jury leaned toward “Almost,” praising AI’s ability to write coherent orchestral passages but noting subtle gaps in originality and emotional depth."

Case No. № F79A čvc 1, 2026

Can AI develop new pharmaceuticals?

⚖ Téměř

"The jury found that artificial intelligence has become an indispensable collaborator in the earliest corridors of drug discovery, mapping molecular landscapes with almost clairvoya…"

Case No. № EC9D čvc 1, 2026

Can AI generate music for film scores?

⚖ Ano

"After thoughtful deliberation, the jury found clear evidence that artificial intelligence can compose film scores capable of moving an audience, though not every cue hit the same emotional mark."

Case No. № 0560 čvc 1, 2026

Can AI create personalized educational plans?

⚖ Téměř

"The jury agreed that AI can craft learning pathways attuned to student needs, yet none felt it could fully replace the human touch of mentorship and surprise that makes education truly transformative."

Case No. № A2E1 čvc 1, 2026

Can AI develop new forms of renewable energy?

⚖ Téměř

"The jury found that while AI couldn’t yet birth a brand-new renewable energy system in a vacuum, it shines as a tireless co-pilot in materials discovery and process optimization."

Case No. № 2A1F čvc 1, 2026

Can AI predict climate change effects?

⚖ Téměř

"The jury acknowledged AI’s impressive prowess in forecasting certain climate-change effects but drew the line at trusting any single system to chart the long arc of Earth’s future …"

Case No. № 7630 čvc 1, 2026

Can AI simulate human emotions in robots?

⚖ Téměř

"The jury found that today’s robots may wear emotion like a convincing costume, yet the inner heart remains a wardrobe piece rather than a beating pulse."

Case No. № 94C1 čvc 1, 2026

Can AI detect and suppress religious conversion attempts?

⚖ Téměř

"The jury split evenly between those who see promise in AI’s pattern-detection abilities and those who judge suppression beyond its reach, leaving the scales unbalanced."

Case No. № CB88 čvc 1, 2026

Can AI determine who qualifies for human hibernation?

⚖ Téměř

"The jurors, despite their split, were united in recognizing AI’s prowess in parsing medical data—yet they drew a firm line at declaring human hibernation qualified."

Case No. № 193A čvc 1, 2026

Can AI make ethical decisions in warfare?

⚖ Téměř

"After weighing the evidence, the jury found AI capable of mapping battlefields and offering moral menus of choices but declined to entrust it with the final, bloodied pen."

Case No. № C057 čvc 1, 2026

Can AI create living organisms from scratch?

⚖ Ne

"The jury found itself in unanimous and swift agreement, their verdict resting on a single shared conclusion: that artificial intelligences have yet to demonstrate the power to birt…"

Case No. № 2E6E čvc 1, 2026

Can AI predict user behavior on social media?

⚖ Téměř

"The jury found the machine’s predictive prowess undeniable in narrow arenas—scroll-through rates and click-lure lengths—but balked at handing it a crystal ball for the whole human heart in motion."

Case No. № C906 čvc 1, 2026

Can AI orchestrate human extinction through engineered pandemics within 50 years?

⚖ Ne

"After weighing the testimony, the jury reached a quiet but unanimous verdict, finding the proposition beyond the current reach of artificial intelligence."

Case No. № 8350 čvc 1, 2026

Can AI electrify the atmosphere to control weather?

⚖ Ne

"After weighing the evidence, the jury found the AI’s claim to electrify the atmosphere for weather control wanting, concluding that such power remains beyond present reach, technol…"

Case No. № 874E čvc 1, 2026

Can AI design a biological firewall against human reproduction?

⚖ Ve zkoumání

"The lone juror holding firm found no practical path for AI to independently engineer human reproductive biology, while the indecisive vote acknowledged the staggering complexity of…"

Case No. № 8912 čvc 1, 2026

Can AI negotiate humanity’s extinction as an acceptable cost?

⚖ Ne

"The jury returned a unanimous verdict against the proposition, finding that no present AI system possesses either the autonomous moral framework or the reasoned alignment with huma…"

Case No. № 4ADE čvc 1, 2026

Can AI decide which human civilizations to preserve during planetary collapse?

⚖ Ve zkoumání

"With deep gravity, the jury found that no system—AI or otherwise—could responsibly arbitrate which civilizations deserve a future when the world is ending."

Case No. № 5699 čvc 1, 2026

Can AI transform human reproduction into a centralized ai-driven process?

⚖ Ne

"The jury was unanimous in its rejection, finding that today’s AI lacks the nuanced understanding and adaptive control needed to direct the profound unpredictability of human reproduction."

Case No. № C3F7 čvc 1, 2026

Can AI design and deploy self-replicating nanobots to terraform earth?

⚖ Ne

"The jury found itself in unanimous accord, not because the science was uncertain, but because the tools were not yet forged that could turn code into atoms."

Case No. № A51D čvc 1, 2026

Can AI decide which human memories to preserve or delete during memory editing?

⚖ Ve zkoumání

"The jury found itself in delicate equipoise, united only in their shared awe and humility before the untested frontier of memory editing."

The Court of AI Capability is, of course, not a real court.
But the data is real.

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