Stuff AI CAN'T Do
§

The Court of AI Capability

Public Docket · Stuff AI Can't Do
Case No. № 4991 may. 15, 2026

Can AI forge passport photo images and fake an avatar to fool identification methods?

⚖ Sí

"The jury found the evidence overwhelming and unanimous: AI’s current toolkit—generative adversarial networks, diffusion models, and photorealistic rendering—can indeed fabricate pa…"

Case No. № 40E2 may. 15, 2026

Can AI generate a parody of any popular song's lyrics?

⚖ Sí

"After reviewing the evidence with equal measures of enthusiasm and lexical delight, the jury found that AI can indeed produce parody verses that rhyme on cue and twist lyrics with mischievous charm."

Case No. № 9C59 may. 15, 2026

Can AI generate a personalized birthday poem?

⚖ Sí

"After careful and unanimous deliberation, the jury found that language models have crossed the threshold of competence in crafting personalized birthday poems—able to weave names, …"

Case No. № D6D9 may. 15, 2026

Can AI write a horoscope or tarot reading?

⚖ Sí

"After careful deliberation, the jury found that language models have indeed mastered the celestial art of stringing together stars and symbols with commendable flair, though they s…"

Case No. № CCCE may. 15, 2026

Can AI generate a 30-second tv ad script?

⚖ Sí

"After careful consideration, the jury found that today’s AI tools can stitch together a 30-second TV ad script from prompt to playback in under a minute, blending coherent visuals …"

Case No. № 8D94 may. 15, 2026

Can AI write a press release from a one-line brief?

⚖ Sí

"The jury found in the affirmative, convinced that AI’s ability to distill a single line into a polished press release has crossed the threshold from experimental to effective."

Case No. № 107C may. 15, 2026

Can AI write blog-post outlines in any niche?

⚖ Sí

"After carefully considering the evidence, the jury found that artificial intelligence has reached a level of proficiency where it can reliably produce nuanced, niche-appropriate bl…"

Case No. № A45A may. 15, 2026

Can AI generate stock-photo-quality images of any subject?

⚖ Sí

"After hearing the evidence, the jury found that modern diffusion models routinely produce stock-photo-quality images, delivering photorealistic, high-resolution results with reliab…"

Case No. № 5AAA may. 15, 2026

Can AI generate marketing copy in any specified brand voice?

⚖ Sí

"The jury unanimously agreed that today’s language models can craft marketing copy in a specified brand voice with remarkable fidelity, provided clear guidelines are supplied, findi…"

Case No. № 1F0B may. 15, 2026

Can AI determine where i am in 10 yes or no questions?

⚖ Sí

"The jury found that while pure guesswork would fail, an AI equipped with structured geographic inference could indeed narrow a user’s position within ten yes-or-no questions by tre…"

Case No. № 6595 may. 15, 2026

Can AI convert handwritten notes to clean text?

⚖ Sí

"The jury unanimously declared this capability within reach, citing mature optical character recognition pipelines and handwriting-specific deep learning models already deployed in everyday tools."

Case No. № DF36 may. 15, 2026

Can AI compose original chiptune music?

⚖ Sí

"After lively deliberations in chambers, the jury unanimously agreed that artificial intelligence has indeed mastered the art of chiptune composition, cranking out melodies that cou…"

Case No. № 2AA0 may. 15, 2026

Can AI outperform radiologists at certain tumor-detection benchmarks?

⚖ Sí

"After thorough deliberation, the jury found unanimous agreement that artificial intelligence has surpassed human radiologists in certain tumor-detection benchmarks, citing recent s…"

Case No. № 77B2 may. 15, 2026

Can AI land a rocket booster on a moving barge?

⚖ Sí

"After carefully weighing the evidence, the jury found that artificial intelligence has already achieved the finesse to land a rocket booster on a moving barge with remarkable consistency."

Case No. № 12BB may. 15, 2026

Can AI identify depression markers in writing samples?

⚖ Sí

"The jury found unanimously that AI can indeed spot the linguistic fingerprints of depression in writing, citing its proven aptitude for parsing tone, syntax, and diction with a rel…"

Case No. № B855 may. 15, 2026

Can AI pilot a small drone autonomously through obstacles?

⚖ Sí

"The jury returned a unanimous verdict in the affirmative, convinced that autonomous drones can now navigate obstacle courses with the reliability of a cautious courier threading through city traffic."

Case No. № FFE5 may. 15, 2026

Can AI generate functional podcast scripts from a topic outline?

⚖ Sí

"The jury found that today’s large language models can reliably transform topic outlines into coherent, structured podcast scripts with distinct voices and proper formatting, acting…"

Case No. № E547 may. 15, 2026

Can AI identify dog breeds from photos at expert level?

⚖ Sí

"The jury found, unanimously and without hesitation, that today’s AI can already outshine human experts in identifying dog breeds from photographs."

Case No. № 7635 may. 15, 2026

Can AI identify plant species from leaf photographs?

⚖ Sí

"After reviewing the evidence, the jury found the case overwhelmingly clear—deep learning models have already mastered the art of identifying plants from leaf photographs with impressive precision."

Case No. № 8389 may. 15, 2026

Can AI generate a 60-second commercial-quality video from a prompt?

⚖ Sí

"The jury found that while AI has crossed the threshold into video generation, its clips are still more sketch reel than Super Bowl spot, unanimously acknowledging the leap forward …"

Case No. № 0ABD may. 15, 2026

Can AI solve a rubik's cube in under a second with a robot?

⚖ Sí

"After thorough deliberation, the jury found that AI-driven robotics have indeed tipped the scales in the Rubik’s cube challenge, with optimizations in both algorithmic precision an…"

Case No. № 1B0C may. 15, 2026

Can AI generate plausible synthetic training data for ml models?

⚖ Sí

"The jury found unanimously that AI may lawfully enter the faculty lounge of synthetic data generation, where its gift for plausible imitation has already been put to productive use…"

Case No. № 5D2C may. 15, 2026

Can AI identify a specific painting from a 100-pixel thumbnail?

⚖ Sí

"After weighing the competing claims, three jurors nodded to the machine’s uncanny knack for divining brushstrokes amid digital static, while one sole skeptic argued resolution crum…"

Case No. № 0117 may. 15, 2026

Can AI generate animated character motion from a rough sketch?

⚖ Sí

"The jury found that while today’s tools can turn a sketch into motion with remarkable speed, the craft still leans on old-school techniques—pose estimation, diffusion models, and a dash of human touch."

The Court of AI Capability is, of course, not a real court.
But the data is real.

¿Nos faltó uno?

Revisamos semanalmente.