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Stuff AI CAN'T Do
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The Court of AI Capability

Public Docket · Stuff AI Can't Do
Case No. № 1212 Jul 1, 2026

Can AI detect parkinson’s from subtle voice changes in a 30-second recording?

⚖ Fast

"With one voice ringing clear and two cautious nods of approval, the jury agreed the science is here but the scale is still small, citing powerful demonstrations on tight datasets r…"

Case No. № F9E4 Jul 1, 2026

Can AI predict epileptic seizures five minutes in advance using eeg headband data?

⚖ Fast

"The jury found that early-stage models show promise but cannot yet guarantee the five-minute precision required for clinical use, praising real-time prototypes that miss the mark a quarter of the time."

Case No. № 1FDC Jul 1, 2026

Can AI diagnose endometriosis from menstrual cycle irregularities detected in period-tracking app data?

⚖ Fast

"The jury agreed that pattern recognition is within AI’s reach, yet none could vouch for a diagnosis untouched by human oversight."

Case No. № 8DC3 Jul 1, 2026

Can AI detect early-stage parkinson’s disease from subtle voice tremors in phone calls?

⚖ Fast

"The jury found itself torn between cautious optimism and clinical prudence, with two of its members voting “Almost” for AI’s ability to pick out the faintest vocal tremors of early…"

Case No. № 984D Jul 1, 2026

Can AI predict individual cancer relapse risk using tumor genetic sequencing?

⚖ Fast

"After hearing the evidence, the jury leaned cautiously toward optimism but stopped short of full endorsement, acknowledging real-world progress while still questioning the breadth …"

Case No. № FA8E Jul 1, 2026

Can AI detect deepfake videos by analyzing microscopic inconsistencies in blinking patterns?

⚖ Fast

"After careful deliberation, the jury found itself cautiously optimistic: AI could indeed spot the telltale flickers in a deepfake’s blink cycle, but only when given carefully curat…"

Case No. № 0B0E Jul 1, 2026

Can AI predict multiple sclerosis flare-ups from changes in smartphone typing speed patterns?

⚖ Fast

"The jury acknowledged that AI has already glimpsed the telltale tremor in every keystroke, proving correlation is within reach—but consensus faltered at the door of real-world vali…"

Case No. № 5F03 Jul 1, 2026

Can AI identify early huntington’s disease from subtle changes in eye movement while reading long text?

⚖ Fast

"The jury halted just short of a full embrace, acknowledging that AI can detect minute eye-movement shifts but has yet to prove it can single out Huntington’s from among the many ot…"

Case No. № 1157 Jul 1, 2026

Can AI diagnose early-stage alzheimer’s using subtle changes in speech patterns?

⚖ Fast

"The jury agreed that today’s AI can spot the whisper-thin tremors of early Alzheimer’s in speech, but stops just short of the courtroom door marked “Diagnosis.” With no dissents an…"

Case No. № F598 Jul 1, 2026

Can AI identify tuberculosis from cough audio recordings with better accuracy than human clinicians?

⚖ Fast

"The jury struggled to call a unanimous verdict on whether AI could definitively outperform human clinicians in detecting tuberculosis from cough audio, though they all agreed it ha…"

Case No. № AD11 Jul 1, 2026

Can AI generate personalized chemotherapy regimens by analyzing tumor microenvironment images?

⚖ Fast

"The jury found AI impressively capable of parsing tumor microenvironments—yet deemed its regimens too precious for unsupervised delivery."

Case No. № 89FD Jul 1, 2026

Can AI generate personalized diet plans based on gut microbiome dna data?

⚖ Fast

"The jury found that while AI can analyze gut microbiome DNA to produce personalized diet plans, its recommendations remain partial and imperfect rather than fully reliable."

Case No. № 597E Jul 1, 2026

Can AI reconstruct 3d bone structures from standard x-ray images?

⚖ Fast

"The jury found that while AI can already sketch in the outlines of 3D bone structure from plain X-rays, it still stumbles once those bones leave the textbook and hit the real world."

Case No. № 1FE3 Jul 1, 2026

Can AI predict diabetes progression using retinal imaging data?

⚖ Fast

"With one juror convinced that retinal imaging can reliably forecast diabetes progression and another cautiously noting that deep learning models are advancing but not yet infallibl…"

Case No. № D84E Jul 1, 2026

Can AI predict urban air pollution levels at street level using satellite and traffic data?

⚖ Fast

"With near-unanimity, the jury applauded AI’s ability to generate working street-level pollution forecasts from satellite and traffic feeds, yet hesitated to award a full “yes” unti…"

Case No. № 5FED Jul 1, 2026

Can AI control swarms of drones?

⚖ Fast

"After spirited deliberation, the jury declined to grant full clearance, finding the docket insufficiently navigated; demonstrations of small-scale swarms dazzled, but the leap to c…"

Case No. № CAD4 Jul 1, 2026

Can AI generate plausible scientific hypotheses from vast biomedical literature in seconds?

⚖ Fast

"The jury agreed that artificial intelligence has become a nimble librarian of biomedical knowledge, able to scan libraries in seconds and whisper plausible hypotheses while the lab…"

Case No. № 49A8 Jul 1, 2026

Can AI compose music for orchestras?

⚖ Fast

"The jury leaned toward “Almost,” praising AI’s ability to write coherent orchestral passages but noting subtle gaps in originality and emotional depth."

Case No. № F79A Jul 1, 2026

Can AI develop new pharmaceuticals?

⚖ Fast

"The jury found that artificial intelligence has become an indispensable collaborator in the earliest corridors of drug discovery, mapping molecular landscapes with almost clairvoya…"

Case No. № 0560 Jul 1, 2026

Can AI create personalized educational plans?

⚖ Fast

"The jury agreed that AI can craft learning pathways attuned to student needs, yet none felt it could fully replace the human touch of mentorship and surprise that makes education truly transformative."

Case No. № A2E1 Jul 1, 2026

Can AI develop new forms of renewable energy?

⚖ Fast

"The jury found that while AI couldn’t yet birth a brand-new renewable energy system in a vacuum, it shines as a tireless co-pilot in materials discovery and process optimization."

Case No. № 2A1F Jul 1, 2026

Can AI predict climate change effects?

⚖ Fast

"The jury acknowledged AI’s impressive prowess in forecasting certain climate-change effects but drew the line at trusting any single system to chart the long arc of Earth’s future …"

Case No. № 7630 Jul 1, 2026

Can AI simulate human emotions in robots?

⚖ Fast

"The jury found that today’s robots may wear emotion like a convincing costume, yet the inner heart remains a wardrobe piece rather than a beating pulse."

Case No. № 94C1 Jul 1, 2026

Can AI detect and suppress religious conversion attempts?

⚖ Fast

"The jury split evenly between those who see promise in AI’s pattern-detection abilities and those who judge suppression beyond its reach, leaving the scales unbalanced."

The Court of AI Capability is, of course, not a real court.
But the data is real.

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